Standards of Practice

I don’t generally write a post about updating my side bar, but I decided that this was important. My younger two kids have now been home one year. Prior to their arrival, whenever Vera of A Child’s Voice International Advocacy wrote anything, I read the entry as soon as it came up on bloglines. Her blog is a rich resource outlining the process, problems and politics affecting adoptions in Haiti. I still subscribe to Vera’s blog feed, but I tend to mark her entries “Keep New” and read them at my leisure. While I remain interested in Haitian adoptions, have many virtual friends in the process of adopting from Haiti and sometimes field questions about the adoption process. I no longer feel the need to try and discern, “Where is our dossier now?”

Anyway, we had an exciting day that ended with a trip to the ED for my husband. David had accidentally forked him in the eye. Luckily the fork was plastic, the impact was indirect, there wasn’t a whole lot of force behind the blow and there wasn’t any penetration. He does have a huge corneal abrasion and a lot of eye pain. I came home wound up and have been doing some reading.

Article IX. BIRTH PARENT (FAMILY) CONTACT
Intent
To ensure that any contact between the potential adoptive family and birth family is conducted according to Best Practices
To eliminate any possibility of incentivising the relinquishment or abandonment of a child
To ensure that the birth family retains its informed consent
Section 9.01 When an CSP coordinates a meeting between Prospective Adoptive Parents (PAPs) and the birth parent or birth family, certain guidelines must be followed:
(a) The meeting will occur only after IBESR approval of the adoption;
(b) Neither money nor gifts which can easily be converted to money shall be exchanged;
(c) Meetings will be facilitated by staff from the CSP or ASP, who will be in attendance and in full control of the meeting at all times;
(d) Meetings will occur only when both parties—PAPs and the birth parent/birth family—agree;
(e) Visits will take place in a controlled, quiet, neutral environment rather than in a public setting. The visit should not take place at the birth family’s home or at the adoptive family’s hotel/guesthouse without the express consent of both the birth family and the PAPs.
(f) There should not be any exchange of contact information (addresses, e-mail, telephone numbers), nor direct contact between birth families and PAPs. All correspondence must go through the CSP and/or ASP.
(g) Only letters (void of contact information) and photos shall be exchanged after the adoption.

~ From Standards of Practice for Child Welfare Organizations With Respect To Intercountry Adoption signed January 29, 2009 in Port-au-Prince, Haiti

I generally describe Marissa’s adoption as semi-open. Marissa’s mother has our contact information. She calls Marissa whenever she wants. However, when we relocated to Minnesota, Marissa and her mother were geographically separated. Phone calls and letters don’t really allow for a meaningful one-to-one relationship between Marissa and her mother and birth family. People advocating for open adoptions generally argue that an open adoption is the most child-centered option. In international adoption, most experts argue for less contact. No one wants families living in poverty to conclude that after an adoption is complete the adoptive family will support the family remaining in country. This has been a point of contention in my home. Beverly frequently asks to send money to her Mama Rosaline in Haiti. That is what she wanted to do with her birthday and Christmas money. It is really hard to explain to a 5-year-old that she isn’t allowed to do this. I think I would be comfortable with more contact between the kids and their moms, but I will respect this standard. And, I will make sure that the moms get photos and updates.

Hat Tip: Child Protection in Haiti – Joint Council Standards of Practice Initiative.